The ‘why’ behind my debut

When I first started writing, I thought my debut would be a fantasy novel, big, intricate, and full of world building. I still love that story, and one day, I’ll return to it. But as I began working through its twists and turns, I realised that for a debut, I needed to start somewhere that felt closer to my heart. Something that would let me find my voice before diving into something vast and sprawling.

That’s when this book — my book — began to take shape.

I’ve had a fascination with the mafia for as long as I can remember. From Mario Puzo’s books to Al Capone’s history, from old gangster films to modern retellings like John Wick and the likes. I’ve always been drawn to that world, not only for the violence or glamour, but for the loyalty. The code. The found family that often exists within the chaos.

When I look back, I realise that’s what has always pulled me in, the idea of family.
I’m an only child, and my own family has its fair share of heartbreak. The concept of a group of people who will stand by you no matter what, who would go to war for you, is foreign to me, but deeply compelling. So, I wrote about it.

I wanted to create characters who are bound by loyalty, not blood. People who choose each other. Who fight for each other. Who are flawed, scarred, and sometimes broken, but who love fiercely all the same.

Of course, that idea became more personal than I ever expected. As I wrote, pieces of my own experiences began to slip onto the page, quiet moments, fears, and fragments of myself I hadn’t realised I was sharing until the words were already there. I’ll tell that story another day, but for now, let’s just say this book became something much deeper than I had planned.

And honestly? The process has been hard.
I’ll share more about that journey too in a later blog, but let it be known imposter syndrome is real. The constant worry that no one will ever read this book — or worse, that they will, and they’ll hate it, is something that sits quietly in the background every time I sit down to write.

But despite the fear, this story demanded to be written. It’s my beginning, not just as a writer, but as someone finally brave enough to share the stories that have lived inside her for years.

So, here we are: the first book of a five-part interconnected series. Each story stands alone but shares threads of loyalty, love, and found family.

And this is where it all began. 🖤